It is increasingly apparent that well-developed verbal communication skills are becoming a rarity as the digital age continues to evolve. This trend is particularly evident among younger people (i.e. mid twenties and below), many who seem to have chosen the route of hiding behind digital screens in preference to stumping-up to talk face-to-face with another person.
Based on my first-hand experiences in various management roles – and now as a tertiary education provider – I can tell you that the quality of human relationships in N.Z. is crumbling…and conceivably (I think) largely due to people being unwilling to connect with one-another in good old fashion open and honest conversation.
I believe that the No. 1 reason for this being the case is that people have grown tired of conflict, have grown tired of having their views challenged and have grown tired of being frustrated at even the slightest of difference in points of view between two or more people erupting in some form of dispute/ argument. Secondly, I believe that (particularly in the case of Kiwis) our sense of wanting to grow/ protect our independence is serving to repel ideas/ input from others. Unfortunately, these people have chosen the strategy of “avoidance”, rather than think about how they could instead address/ question/ constructively challenge/ accommodate the ideas of others…versus challenging the person/ people who are communicating the given idea.
What’s happening New Zealand ?! Is it time that we looked at changing key words in the N.Z. national anthem from “God defend N.Z.” to “God help N.Z.” ? I’m tending to think so.
I’ll tell you what I think has happened (and continues to unfold)…
- As evidenced by conversations that I have with various teachers/ friends ongoing, many parents are not talking with their children anywhere near the extent that parents used to.
- Many parents are finding that allowing their children to be consumed by digital device interaction is a great way of shifting parental responsibility and creating time for parents to pursue their own interests.
- The “Stranger Danger” message instilled in kids at school is helping distrust of other people along nicely.
- Electronic messages are being seen as a way of creating proof of having “told” someone else something. i.e. proof of having discharged one’s communication responsibility.
- Communication is now being viewed as a mechanical operation performed only when the absolute need to do so arises…no longer is communication regarded as the fundamental healthy essential way for two or more people to get along together…to share thoughts, feelings and opinions.
I believe that society needs to be very careful going forward that we don’t treat communication – particularly verbal communication – as a “commodity”. The tendency for thoughts/ ideas/ opinions to be treated as “commodities” is likely to increase as society increasingly comes to understand that common sense (wisdom) is becoming the most valuable “intellectual capital” in the world – regardless of country.
For society to achieve/ retain open and positive people connections, trust is the essential ingredient…and in my experience the most vital way that trust is developed and nurtured is through face-to-face people interaction. Interestingly enough, I’ve just had two prominent experienced business people provide guest presenter deliveries to two of my student classes at EIT; and the underlying message of just how important the fostering and preservation of constructive face-to-face relationships is, came through loud and clear by these two people also.